Long Distance Love (Part A).

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV).

Do grad students fall in love? Do they stay in love? Do they value relationships?  Is being in a committed relationship part of their arsenal?

These questions and the concerns they birth are not too far-fetched.  These could be valid when it seems like grad students are mostly consumed by academic pursuits and meeting deadlines😑. Sometimes, commitment to loved ones could be challenging, but to answer the questions, Yes😍! It is admirable to find lasting relationships and amazing marriages among grad students. How they do it, remains a wonder but the goodnews is that it can be done!

The population of international students, especially the ones in graduate schools records up to millions across the world. Regardless of the statistics and admirable feats they achieve, these are people with real emotions, juggling their time between relationships and commitments of different kinds. Let’s talk about the crucial one, the familial connections they are separated from in most cases, and sometimes, for a long time.

The rate of long distance relationships (LDR) is high, and it could be experienced in courtship or in marriage. A major challenge is simply the DISTANCE. My courtship is one out of a bunch of examples you could pick. I call it my long distance love💝. For most of the years, we have always been in different regions and when I left my home country for graduate school in the US, we were completely apart for a stretch of 28 months. Praise God for His mercies, we are still going strong!

Truth is, we could not have had it better, yet we’ve had our own share of challenges. With long distance relationships come other concerns which might be subtle or pronounced. Marital relationships are a lot of work and seem impossible but when we see them as gifts from God to nurture according to His purpose, they are for His glory.

Photo by Maddi Bazzocco on Unsplash

Committed relationships among graduate students still exist whether with people near or far. May I suggest 5 things to keep in mind….

1. Teamwork.

Congratulations! You got to that place you’ve waited for patiently. You both envisioned it, motivated each other for it and prepared towards it. Now, God came through for you both and the prayers were answered. Only that, one of you will have to be away (maybe thousands of miles) while the other holds the fort on the other side. It is time to roll up your sleeves. The other team player is not limited to your spouse or partner alone. They could be your family, colleagues, friends or those who represent where you are coming from. This relationship is going to be a test of what you both stand for and how far you are willing to go. Remember why you started in the first place. Make sure the distance (or whatever the challenges might be) is reduced to just a clause because you are both willing and obedient to go the whole nine yards. You may be waking up at different time zones on two different ends of the world but maintain one mind and one purpose. Join me nextweek, as we talk about the other 4, God willing!!

⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres…

Love is a beautiful gift and may we celebrate it every single day of our lives!

WHAT KEEPS YOU GOING WITH YOUR LONG DISTANCE LOVE?

Special note: Would you give your life to Jesus Christ? He is the way, the truth and the life. If yes, please pray the prayers below:

Lord Jesus, thank you for your death and resurrection for the salvation of my soul. Please forgive all my sins. I choose you today to follow and to obey. May your love and the holy spirit lead and guide my purpose for your glory. Thank you, my Lord and savior. Amen!

Grace and blessings,

Olushola.